wednesday

so yesterday i had two root canals and the beginning of a bridge done, on top of that i'm sick too. this morning i took four advils, 2 sudafeds and 1 amoxicillan ... what a healthy breakfast that was LOL. i'm going to post pictures later today after i upload them cause i haven't done so yet of our Easter. my daughter had a blast doing the easter egg hunt and surprise my cousin came over for the day (from Florida). It was good but i think being outside is what got me sick. great. so look for pictures later.

xoxo
cat

OMG Good Friday

I'm f'n bored. seriously bored. unbelievably bored. there is no work to do no one is at work everyone is off of work and i'm stuck here sitting at my desk doing nothing when the only real thing to do is file and who the f wants to file like ever. i got enough papercuts and scratches from filing yesterday. it's annoying i wanna go home this is BULLSHIT.

Don't read if easily disgusted

hahaha i share because i can ...

so i'm having the worst cramps ever, i feel like i have a waterfall between my legs and it's just plain old painful and disgusting and all i want to do i go lay down in the fetal position and cry. i haven't felt like this in soooooooo long i don't even remember the last time.

here is my theory as to why this is happening:

i have been on the pill since i had my daughter she is about to be 3. so you figure 3 years of almost non-existent very light (dark colored) periods right. so my theory is that because of the pill it builds it extra protection against the lining on the walls it kills it or whatever (this is just me i'm no doctor expert so if i'm wrong i'm wrong) this way the sperm doesn't swim up and try and attack my egg because it has all this lining that it doesn't make it there. like super spermicide attack of the killer wall lining haha. anyway so my point is that now that i'm not on the pill the wall is growing and regaining it's strength and in that it's starting to come down how it should normally completely red and heavy pieces of tissue and it's disgusting when you go to the bathroom and no i wasn't pooin or peein but you sit down and you know you feel all heavy and then plop goes the tissue in the toilet hahaha. nasty right. so now that the lining on the walls are comin down properly now his sperm can swim happily to my egg and begin to hibernate into a baby hahaha.

sorry if i grossed you out but i warned you!

( . )

i haven't written in here since december, how sad is that. can you believe it's already April. I'm just super emotional and just stressed out today. I got my . that's always a plus. But more than that it's just i feel like i'm being pulled in all types of directions and all i want to do is hide under a rock. if i could find out that would be comfortable.

work - i'm doing work for this chick that is on maternity leave (i am only one person and i dont know her brand that well ppl please give me a fucking break), it's no fun doing the job of two ppl and only get paid for one. and on top of that not getting recognized for it only being told to do more do more do more. fuck i'm only human give me a break please. i'm tired...

home - i almost feel like i'm not really spending time with my daughter so i'm starting to feel guilty about that. my bf is not working right now which is fine but sometimes i wish i didn't have to do it all myself you know. and did i mention i got my . which isn't the best news but hey it's only been a month of trying so you can't expect a miracle right?

I'm just not feeling myself right now, i'm just so damn tired of all the BS that has to do with life and work mainly. i wake up in the morning and i don't want to get out of bed because i know i have to go to work. i get to work and say i dont want to get out of my car, for what. i sit at my desk and say i don't want to do this anymore. there's just something about this place that is so depressing sometimes. why can't i be a trust fund baby lol.